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40 Day Love Dare - The Book | Fireproof - The Movie | 40 Day Love Dare Journal
STORIES
Do you have a story or an experience with The Love Dare that you would like to share?
We would love to hear them and give other couples the opportunity to read your stories.
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2/9/2009
I'm going to perfectly honest with myself and God, I've lost my way. I knew it, but I thought, hey I'm still a Christian, I still believe with all of my heart and soul that God is my savior. But the realization came over the weekend full force after watching the Fireproof movie. I have 4 young daughters and I want to be an example to them in all that I do. I also have a loving husband who I've been married to for almost 9 years. Time has definately made our love stronger but there's something missing. Knowing God, being in touch with him is important and I think that's what is missing. We met in church, took our oaths before God and family but we have not gone to church since before our daughter Emily was born. There are a lot of reasons, some valid some not so much. The long and short of it though is that we need to get back on track. That's the biggest reason that I'm going to be doing the Love Dare. Not because I fear our marriage is going to fail or that we're growing apart. I want us to be closer to each other and fully appreciate the live we have, the children we have and all that God has given to us. I am unworthly of this love. My family is my life and I want to show my husband as well as my kids that God is an important and integeral part of that life as well.

So my letters will be to myself, my husband, my family and foremost to God, who without him I would have nothing. And I'm sorry it took me so long to realize that I've been lost for such a long time, that I'm sure this won't be easy, but it's a commitment that I am bound and determined to make things right between God and I and to have him shine through me every day.

Tomorrow will be my starting day for the Love Dare. I'm praying that my efforts will not go unnoticed and that God will bless my relationships and forgive me when I fail and accept me with open arms when I realize it.




2/9/2009
My boyfriend and I watched the movie about a week ago. We are both christians and he is a firemen so we were both deeply affected by it's story. We have been dating for a little over a year now and have talked about marriage, however not in the near future as I am still in college. This movie really made us think about our relationship and actually strengthened us as a couple because it reminded us of weaknesses in us and that our love for God will help us through the fires in our relationship. I think it is a great movie for unmarried couples as well because it gives us an insite into the rollercoaster of marriage before we make that commitment.

P.S. I is also refreshing to see so many marriages and lives are affected by the book, movie and God. It makes me feel so glad that I am a child of God.


Kara Townsend

Kara



2/8/2009
hi,

I just finished watching the Fireproof-movie, bought the DVD yesterday at our Christian book store.

Me and my ex-husband were married in 1991, divorced in 2004. Lived together again, since July 2005, split February 2007 (did not now that he was having an affair with a work collegue), moved back in with him in Nov 2007. I was then already on the road to be re-Born child of Jesus, but the actual total giving of my heart happened in November/December 2008, after finding out about his numerious affair and chatroom addiction. I am totally committed to make my marraige work with the help of God, Because I know his Son died in order for us to have eternal life.

While watching the movie, as so many others had said, it was like watching our marraige. Except I am the wife and I see all the wrong things that I did in both Caleb & Catherine. I am starting the 40 day challenge tomorrow, but will count the days only over weekends, as my husband is working away from home. Pray for us, please! But I feel that if I completed this dare, that we will be on the road to recovery. I am also sending the DVD to my husband tomorrow - by speed-post - with a letter apologizing and asking forgiveness for all the words spoken with a very sharp tongue and all the hurt that I have caused him over the years.

Thanks for making such a inspiring movie. God bless all the people that have been involved in this movie. It really opened my eyes to all my faults, of which I was mostly pairtially aware.

Regards,

Wendy du Plooy
Gauteng, South Africa

Wendy



2/8/2009
I WOULD LIKE TO SAY THANK YOU, THANK YOU, FOR PUTTING THIS MOVIE FOR PEOPLE LIKE MYSELF AND MY HUSBAND. WE HAVE BEEN MARRIED FOR 3 1/2 YEARS AND WE ARE EXACTLY AT THE PLACE WHERE THIS MOVIE IS. MY HUSBAND'S MOTHER PASSED AWAY 2 YEARS AGO ON CHRISTMAS DAY AND HE HASN'T BEEN THE SAME SINCE. HE IS VERY SELFISH TOWARD ME AND IS ALWAYS SAYING NEGATIVE THINGS TO ME. AS I WATCHED THIS MOVIE, I MYSELF AM STEPPING UP TO THE PLATE AND WE ARE GOING TO MAKE OUR MARRIAGE WORK. IM GOING TO USE THIS MOVIE TO WATCH A EVENING WITH MY HUSBAND. IT TOUCHED ME IN MY HEART BECAUSE I BELIEVE JESUS IS THE ONLY ANSWER!

CHER




2/8/2009
I SAW THE MOVIE AND IT MADE ME CRY NOT BECUASE IT WAS SAD BUT BECAUSE I SAW MYSELF IN THAT MOVIE SCREAMING AND YELLING AT MY WIFE FOR NOT BEING APPRECIATED. THOUGH I DONT HAVE AN PORNOGRAPHY ADDICTION WHAT I HAVE IS ANOTHER BEING ITS VERBALLY ABUSSIVE TO MY WIFE FOR THE LAST 10 YEARS. I CRIED BECAUSE I ALSO LONG FOR THAT PEACE WITHIN MYSELF AND OUR HOME. I PRAYING MORE THEN I DID BEFORE AND THIS TIME IM NOT VERING OFF COARSE 'I'M IN " NO MATTER WHAT. SJE TELLS ME THAT SHE DOESNT WANT ME HOME BUT I AM STAYING THE COARSE ....EVERYONE PLEASE PRAY FOR US FOR I KNOW GOD IS IN CONTROL..





2/8/2009
Thank you so much for this movie. It made both my husband & I cry. It really hit home & I love how the movie presents God's love & patience. It is a passionate story that themes on Grace & forgiveness toward our spouses. Most importantly, I love how it made me look at myself & say, "Wow, I have some things I need to work on!" Many of my friends are also talking about this movie. It's wonderful because it dealt w/issues that marriages are constantly competing against like pornography & work-related infidelity. My thanks to the entire "FireProof" cast & to everyone involved in the 40 day love project!!
Marina, Los Angeles, CA.




2/8/2009
2/8/09
The day my husband rented this movie had been a rough evening for us we were arguing over something little while i was at work, and he had said that when i got home he was leaving and not comming back...well as fate would have it we didnt say much when i got home and he decided he wanted to go for a ride and rent a movie so he went to the store to see if they had this movie. They did so we watched it with the kids when he got back when the movie was done he appoligized to me for being so mean over something so little and that he was ready to go back to church and worship the lord.. PRAISE GOD!!!! I was so happy. This was a great movie i would recommend it to anyone.
Carrie




2/7/2009
I watched the movie last night and was amazed that there is a story similar to mine. The only difference being that my husband is not living in the same place I am. We have been married for almost 30 yrs. Over 2 yrs ago he started having an affair with another married woman and moved in with her 1 1/2 yrs ago. Not sure how deception moved in. I still love him, want to work things out. I am far from perfect but know that there is forgiveness and a new start with God at the helm. I can't win him back, only God can bring him back. Please pray for a fresh start for us.




2/7/2009
I am in a 15 year marriage that until recently was plagued with addiction to pornography and the devestating carnage it leaves behind. My husband and I, too, have come to the Lord through it. While we continue to struggle, we have never given up. We hope in the Lord, but this movie - Fireproof - relit the "fire" for me with a renewed hope in Christ.

Thank you for continuing to show the greatness of the God we serve. May He continue the good work He started in my marriage and may we be obedient to Him in it!

"There is no pit so deep that God is not deeper still" Thank You.


With a grateful heart-
Arrie





2/7/2009
I watched the Fireproff movie for the first time today. As I sat and watched it I couldn't help but think that that was my husband and I. I have been married for four years now and I myself ahve given my life to Christ, but yet I've failed Christ in so many ways. I wonder how I can get back on track. The thing is here I want my husband right there beside me but I don't see that happening. I can't even get him to go to church with me.

We have been through a lot of bad things in our marriage. I just keep telling myself to hold on. I just wonder how much longer I can hold on. I did buy the Love Dare book right after I watched the movie. I hope it works.




2/7/2009
My husband and I have been married six years and he went to Iraq and came back with a HUGE addiction to PORN and its been really hard ever since, and watching Fireproof was like watching him and I on screen. I love this movie that is how every christian should be every marriage is WORTH the Love dare. I might do it, my husband started to but gave on day 16. Cause he fell out of love with me, cause I'm not his "type" he still hasn't quit gotten marriage G-ds way, but I am still saving my little bit of hope, and I need to work on Forgiveness I am by far not perfect.




2/6/2009
My wife and I are on the 3rd day of the dare! I was promised eternal life a wile back, And all I wanted was my wife to accept Jesus in her life, we are seperated and are starting over again together but now she was given the book and Praise Jesus for work at getting in her heart! At first before this book I did not see us back together but with the will of GOD I now see us back together and happy.

John



2/6/2009
I am so thankful for this movie! Divorce seems to be the GOLDEN ticket nowadays! If I don't like him or her, I can divorce him or her! What does God's Word say? Praise the Lord for this movie. I am going to start the 40 day dare TODAY!




2/6/2009
hello,
my story is not as great as some, but my husband is a fireman, and of course i thought he rented another firestorm, but he kept telling me that it was worth me to watch it with him. that he had heard this was a great movie for couples and for me to give it a try. I gave in and watched it. I cried and cried. i fell in love with this movie. Just watching this movie made me want to love my husband. Its wonderful to see god work. i know that he knew we needed this. It was like a break from life for a little while just so we could reboot are selves with love. We are going to start are 40 day love Dare and cant wait to do it!




2/6/2009
I bought the Fireproof DVD and the Love Dare book without telling my beloved wife, Sheila. I have now watched the movie by myself several times. We have been married over 37 years, some good, some very bad. We both accepted Christ in the mid-70s, but Scripture describes me perfectly when it says, "I don't do the good I want to do, but instead do the evil that I don't want to do" (Romans 7:19 NIV).

My work is in a city that is a 3-hour drive from home. I usually leave home Sunday afternoon and return Friday evening. I don't plan to show Sheila the movie or tell her that I am working through Love Dare until I finish on Friday, March 7. My first act last Friday was to order a bouquet of roses to be delivered before I arrived home. Saturday morning after she awoke, I "customized" Catherine's lines from the movie, where she came to the fire station to see her husband. I told Sheila, "If I haven't told you that you are a wonderful, caring woman, you are." "If I haven't told you that I am sorry for the way I have acted and for the hurtful things I have said to you, I am." "If I haven't told you that I love you, I do, more than words can 'ere express" (that phrase is one Sheila gave me to say to her many, many years ago). There is more, but this is an excerpt. I have been a broken spirit since I saw Fireproof, and she saw that in my trembling voice.

I really made an effort to be gentle and kind with her this past weekend, and for the most part I succeeded, but at least once each day I failed to honour her. Saturday, without asking her, I moved a rattan basket that we have on the kitchen counter because it sometimes gets wet on the bottom. She takes country line dancing lessons Monday evenings, and since I had taken Monday and Tuesday off, I took the opportunity to go watch her, and when she came over to greet me during her first break I tried to kiss her on the cheek. Tuesday evening was her birthday and we asked a couple to join us for supper at a nearby restaurant and then we invited them to come back to our home for tea afterwards. I tried to hold my wife's hand during the visit, and she pulled away. I asked her jokingly, and you won't believe I said this, "Do I have bad breath?" I left for work early Wednesday morning, and when I telephoned her late Wednesday evening, she scolded me. She liked the basket where it was, she said, she was embarrassed and uncomfortable when I tried to kiss her in front of women she hardly know, and she was uncomfortable holding hands in front of our visitors. I am not going to question her judgment, I am going to accept her reactions as righteous. Last night I asked her to help me be the husband she needs.

I am not going to ask her, nor I am going to expect her, to change anything about herself. That is my unconditional love commitment to her. These past few days, I have come to understand how God can accept us just as we are, because that is how I now accept my wife. I am going to endeavour to make our marriage a refuge for her from the raging storm. God made a covenant with Abraham, a covenant where He not only committed Himself, but He committed His Son in Abraham's place. I will do that for Sheila -- I will perform both my part of our marriage covenant, and her part as well. If Ontario Canada had a legislated Covenant Marriage act like Louisiana and Arkansas, it would be my great privilege this summer to renew my vows to this woman God has given me under a legal Covenant Marriage act.

I thank Jesus for His unconditional love for Sheila and I, and I thank Him for her, the wife of my youth.




2/5/2009
My husband and I have already been through the fire about two years ago. Things got really bad and the "d" word was never said by him, but often thought of by me. I was ready to leave. God kept reminding me that I had made a covenant with my husband and that literally is what kept me in the relationship. For the last two years we have gone through counseling and have come to a place of couseling others! God has shown me how to love my husband, and I am learning more and more each day.

The last few months have been a struggle for me though. I picked up this movie from the video store on Friday, but haven't had a chance to watch it. I got it because I knew the basic premis of it, and figured I could use some inspiration. Last night I woke up at 1:00am and couldn't go back to sleep. I was wide awake. So I popped in the movie, Fireproof. I must have cried most of the movie, being able to identify with both of the characters in so many ways. After the movie I stayed up until 5:00am praying and thanking God for ALL MY BLESSINGS! I spent time actually praying for my husband and the things I think about all day that I never give to God. This morning I feel ready. I am going to start this 40 day love dare and see what miracles God wants to do in my own life.




2/5/2009
I celebrated my 51st birthday by inviting 20 of my married friends and associates to my home for breakfast on a Saturday morning. I challenged each of them to first view the movie, which was playing the entire time and then to take the 40 Day Love Dare journey. I had a friend who is a master chef to prepare a simple breakfast of eggs to order, bacon, sausage, grits, hash browns, french toast, fruit, yogart and orange juice/coffee/tea or water. After breakfast I gave a brief testimonial of how viewing the movie Fire Proof on Christmas Day gave me this revelation to buy the 40 Day Love Dare book and take the journey with my husband. This tool has truly helped me in communicating better with my husband. This is both my husband's and my second marriage. And of course we both have lots of baggage from those relationships. To ensure my guests had no excuses for not accepting the dare I gave them each a copy of the 40 Day Love Dare as gifts. I promised them that taking the dare to do the 40 day journey was worth it and not only had it improved my relationship with my husband but through bible study and prayer enriched my relationship with God. This tool is a wonderful blessing and I encourage them to share this blessing with others.




2/5/2009
hello , my wife and i found this movie in the strangest way. our 18 year old son and his girlfriend rented the movie because he and i are volunteer firemen and im sure he was thinking of ladder 49 from the cover. WHAT AN AMAZING MISTAKE!!! he and his girlfriend watched the movie without me and my wife. the following morning i woke earlier than everyone and started to watch the movie about 20 mins into the movie i decided my wife needed to see it at that excat time. woke her (which is a NO NO) but the funniest thing happened when she started to watch the movie lying in bed with me you could see her whole mood change. being awaken at 6:30 am on a sunday infuriates my wife lol. as the movie progressed she was really really into it. you see this could not have been better timing for us a month ago i told my wife how badly i have been missing her love. i am currently unemployed and i do everything for her. have supper ready when she gets home from work,do all the house cleaning, laundary the whole nine yards. she just has not been able to show me any appreciation at all and she told me at this point in her life she is unable to do so. but that was before the movie. about 10 minutes ago she told me to check the internet about the 40 day love challenge and here i am. guess i should have watched the whole movie (i mean the end where this is discussed) my wife wants to do the challenge!!! i do to and i am so so thankful to god that she now sees that our marriage is worth the effort to make much much better through our saviour Jesus Christ. and to think i feel that we owe it all to our 18 year old son by the way who is the same age we were when we became parents. that just further proves to me that god works in mysterious ways.




2/4/2009
I am on my second marriage, and my wife and I have currently been married for five years. She would tell you that those have been five years of selfish hell for her. I was raised in the church, and have heard "all the sermons" on love and realtionships. I have read every book you can think of, and felt that there was no better husband.
True, I had already destroyed a marriage, but surely that was not might fault. True, I have had an ongoing addiction to porn, but who hasn't?
Over the last few years I have allowed that selfishness to take me into areas such as online flirting, and inappropriate conversations with other women. I have watched as my wife was devastated, and I became angry blaming her for everything I did. If she would just "meet my needs", and respect me.....then none of this would happen!!!! Right?
This last summer my wife and children left to go to a family wedding out of state, and while they were gone I caught myself once again seeking fullfillment to my "selfish" needs, but God hit me hard! He slammed me on my face.
What I did not know was while at this wedding my wife was being flirted with and talked to sweetly by other men. She was starting to think how they treated her better than her own husband, and how she had put up with so much. She had come to a conclusion that we were done.
As I stated, I did not know this, but God was working on me. All of the sudden I started seeing what a jerk and selfish man I was. I actually left the night God took me to my knees and drove straight through for about 18 hours to where my wife was. I suprised her, and fell to my knees in front of her expressing to her how I realized how selfish I had been all these years, and how sorry I was. I explained that I saw what I had done, and asked if she could forgive me.
Then the ball hit me! She told me that she had been doing some thinking, and that she believed that everything I was saying was to late. She felt that she had already put up with too much (and in reality she had), and that she couldn't trust that I would change. She told me that she would return home with me only to pack up the things she and the kids would need.
I was crushed! I was hurt! How could this be? I was going to change! I became angry, and wanted to throw it all back in the face of God, and say, "See, it doesn't matter! It isn't me...it is her." I will never forget the look on the face of one my sons when I discovered that they would no longer be living with Dad.
I hadn't heard of the movie or seen it yet, but I believe that God was already putting the truths of this movie into my life. I determined that even though she may not want to love me or be with me I would still love her, and I would treat her the way I should have all a long!
I am proud to say that that was in July and we are now in Febuary of the following year, and have the honor of holding my wife in my arms every night. I wish I could say that I have been a perfect husband since then, with no selfish acts....I can't say that, but what I can say is that each day I am changing, and becoming the husband my wife needs me to be.
The crazy thing....is the more I seek to be the husband she needs me to be...the more I see the wife in her that I have longed for!
I have already started doing alot of what the Love Dare talks about, and I can tell you it is not about what you are doing, but who you are doing it for! The moment you start focusing on the "look what I am doing for you...." that is the moment the love dare becomes selfish, but if you look at WHO you are doing this for....then it becomes love!

Thanks and love goes to my wife for allowing me the honor of being her husband.
Nathan

Nathan



2/4/2009
Like several others, I grabbed the movie not knowing what the actual message of the movie was. And honestly, as soon as they started fighting in the beginning it brought back so many horrible memories from my first marriage that I almost didn't finish watching it. I'm glad that I did though. My husband sat through it with me, hopefully he also got the same message that I did. We've been married for 4 1/2 years, together for 6, and as we're all to familiar with, the everday burdens unfortunately take their tolls on a marriage. I called every bookstore around to find a copy today since I didn't have the patience to wait for one to be ordered. (Read: day one will be a challenge for me.) I know that I'm married to a wonderful man, and between school and work and kids, we just seem to have forgotten about each other. So I'm certain that God has to help us through this one, we've gotten too lost to find our way back out on our own.




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