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40 Day Love Dare - The Book | Fireproof - The Movie | 40 Day Love Dare Journal
STORIES
Do you have a story or an experience with The Love Dare that you would like to share?
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9/30/2015
Been married 18 years together 20 two children one special needs been major bad choices in our marriage. Seems we are farther apart than ever 8 years ago I made a choice to make him happy by doing something I knew was wrong and a sin we had a threesome This lady has since became a member of our family I care for her love her like family but her and my husband have so much in common they have just recently went on a trip for the weekend with other group of friends I did not go due to it would have been unfair to my 17 old to watch her highly function brother that long and I am not into to the biker scene my daughter told me today she thinks her dad is having a affair with our friend I know my husband and I have been close to divorcee before and God has kept us together I know I love him still he told me he had no feelings for me anymore not sure how after this long that happens day one of the love dare my daughter seen me reading the book and she read it said he is too far gone it won't work I need to try everything to work this out. Please pray for us that 20!years is just a waste I know our wonderful God reminded me of this challenge




9/14/2015
My wife and I started out at 16 years old and have lived together for nearly 8 years. We started out with a bang, nothing could slow us down or stop us. Everything was amazing, so amazing that we removed friends and family, quit or jobs, started a business so we could spend every minute together.

After 2 years things started changing. We stopped treating each other well. My response was to start looking outside our relationship. Hers was to hide her feelings, emotions, and stop attributing around the house. As our problems worsened we continued to withhold ourselves from each other. I now realize I was the main cause of this. I ended up having an affair, and taking a women out dinner another time. I treated my wife like she was worth nothing. After 6 years and two kids of me treating this way she asked for a divorce, we moved away from each other. We both started dating others after a few weeks.

During the second week I was dating God made his way into my life. At first I felt as though dating were inappropriate. The day after I stopped I felt compelled to take this challenge, and started attending church. God worked things in miraculous ways, he has made all challenges work in ways that I could never have imagined or completed without him.

After I started the challenge I was finally able to cry after 20 years of not being able to cry, I finally developed a relationship with my mom and step dad after 20 years, I finally stopped watching porn and have no desire to go back, I have stopped drinking (3 years now), I look at women differently, I have emotions, I finally have connected to God, I have a giving/donating mentality, I can finally love, I finally value my wife.

My wife and I are still living seperate, however, I have seen amazing changes in my wife and myself. She is continuing to date others, I am day 36, and I'm excited for each new day. I am excited to continue to fight for our relationship until we die, or until we are no longer married.

Opening my life to God and starting this challenge have been the most rewarding and challenging task I have ever taken on. It has been worth every bit of the challenge.

I will pray for all of those looking to salvage and fix their marraige. I will pray that we make it as well.

- Michael

Michael



9/7/2015
My husband and I have been married for over two years now. It has been a struggle from the very beginning for us. I am not sure If it was that him or I or both of us were not ready to be married, or that we just don't know how to use the tools that we were given. In any case, my husband asked me for a divorce this morning. We have actually split up in the past for a few days and always came back together. This time he said it was over and he no longer loved me. I guess I took for granted that we would always make up. I struggle with forgiveness and my husband did some hurtful things in the beginning of our marriage and I have struggled to let go and forgive him no matter how many times he says he was sorry. I have been trying to be his judge for his mistakes, I've been wrong and now made a mess of things. I have pushed him away.




8/7/2015
Here is my story. My husband and I married five years ago. We've had a very rocky marriage from the start. We are both control freaks and it becomes difficult to let go of the power. We constantly challenge each other. My husband thinks that I don't let him be who he wants to be. He says I take issue with everything from his taste in music to his taste in clothes. He says I nit pick everything. At first I dismissed it thinking he's over reacting. But in truth. I've just been really angry with him and I've been throwing a lot of disappointment his way. You see I'm crazy about my husband. He is truly an amazing and wonderful man. And I love him wholeheartedly. But we've hurt each other with words. His focus has always been on himself and his job and his friends. Consequently, I have helt very alone and abandoned. He would complain that I was too independent. He's basically given up on me. All I ever wanted is to be loved by him. To be cared about. And I don't mean in a sexual way, I mean like I have never been asked are you alright? I hurt all the time and some days I would just like to know that someone cares about me. You see I have a demanding job. People have hi expectations of me. When You can't meet those expectations well people can be cruel to you. On the outside I act as though others actions don't affect me. because my reputation is that I'm tough and nothing hurts me. I'm expected to just suck it up. To be honest. I'm very sensitive. When I'm alone I cry because People don't seem to think that I have any feelings. I long to feel kindness and compassion. my husband told me yesterday that our marriage just isn't working out and that we would be better off apart. I've used my hurt to hurt him. And for this I'm terribly sorry because ultimately I've put the wall there I have pushed him further and further away. It's just a terrible cycle. I started the love dare because I ultimately know that God loves me if know one else and the he will help me.




8/3/2015
Started the dare 8 days ago. My wife and I have been together for 14 years. We started out pretty wild and crazy. She was 19 and I was 26. I was a party animal and she was a young woman independent and beautiful. I was immature in the beginning and didn't know how to treat a woman or really love a woman. She then started a relationship at her job with another guy after about 3 years in to our relationship after our first child was born. I found out a while after and completely changed. I didn't want to lose her. I fought for her and we decided to stay together. We then had our 2nd child. Things were amazing, but somehow I could not let the idea of her with another person go. Every-time she touched me or called me. I thought she did the same with someone else. Eventually I began punishing her for my insecurities, I treated her poorly and controlling. More years went by, we were growing apart. Around our 8th year she bought me the book and I discarded it. I was so angry.
Recently our relationship had taken a dive about 2 years ago when a tragic event hit our family. Things got worst about a year ago she asked me to leave. I have not left yet, she promised me she would try to work on our relationship. I have stared the dare and it is actually working. Very little in the beginning but working yet still. Good luck, i suggest doing it alone without the other persons knowledge. She found out that I am doing it. But is still being receptive. Wish me luck.




7/23/2015
I`m married to my wife for 4 years. I met her when I was only 13 till 17 and lost communication 16 years later I met her again and date or 4 years before we did get married. We start off with a bang. But now it is all work.. If she ask me to do something then i want to fight first but still doing it, I watch the movie several times, today I want to start with the 40 Day Love Dare. Please keep on inspiring us with your positive feedback. If I want to give up i will dare my self to read your comments. I Love My wife with all I have, and I know that she Love`s me.. All I ask is Annie I dare you to give me a change, saw you I Love you and always will

Your wife Rach

Rachael



7/22/2015
My husband was my best friend. The years of marriage coupled with the stress of life(bills, kids, jobs etc) we grew apart. We stop attending church and stop actively loving each other. We both we hungry for love but wasn't willing give in to the other. Our solution was to allow each other to date other people, not sexual. Well of course this was fool's plan.

Our marriage result in living in the same house but different rooms. The house went up for sale and the agreement was to move separately as we didn't see any other way. Well heard the calling of God, stopping me in my tracks. I needed to return to church and seek His word. Through this time God begin to reveal the concerns He had with my marriage.

One of my tasks in the restoration of my marriage is the Love Dare. I am on day 31 and our anniversary is in one week. My husband has turned from me now more than ever. But I am believing in the promise we made many years ago and that God will not let this bond be broken. It may not be saved now but I believe eventually it will. I will not cease loving him actively and the Love Dare will be a part of my life forever. I will Dare myself to love him more each day no matter what.




7/22/2015
My wife and I were shildhood sweethearts. We dated from 16 and went our separate ways when we were older. We met up when we were 25, and the feeling never changed. I loved this women with all my heart, and she became "my light". We got married nad had a beautiful daughter. However, shortly into the marriage, I was unaware that I was becoming depressed, as have done on previous occassions. However, on previous occassions, I managed to dig myself out of it. This time I couldnt, and my wife suffered greatly. She remained as strong as she could ntil she could no longer cope with mu anger, mood swings, loss of touch and intimacy. However, the final straw was my willingness to do nothing about it, this broke her. She could see everything slpping away that we built up. Eventually, I moved out of the family home and remained in a depressed state. I eventually sought counselling, and it has saved me. My wife has moved forward, but I will not be left behind. I am trying my hardest to get back into her life and be the man that I was on the day that we married. I made a promise to her that I will keep. I have seen the DVD and have now started the challenge. I do everything in my power to have her by my side and grow old with.

Ryan



7/1/2015
My husband and I have been married for 2 years and everything was great, until we moved into our new house. He seems more distant and I have noticed some things have changed, including the time we spend together. I miss this time more than anything. I love him more than anything. We met when I was only 16, we went our separate ways for about 15 years. When I saw him again for the first time, it was like meeting him again for the first time. When he asked me to be his wife, I was so happy, a dream come true! I just want back what we had in the beginning. I have decided to start the love dare challenge today, July 1,2015, I love the movie and pray it can work for us too. Please keep us in your prayers, I believe everyone deserves to be happy with the ones they love!




6/7/2015
Watched it 4 times over 3 years with my beautiful bride (Edee Robinett) with great hopes. I love this movie it touches me every time. Took the love dare. I found that it dosent work with my wife who knowingly has severe OCPD coupled with hoarding & refuses to get any help. OCPD & the hoarding has destroyed our marriage.




6/6/2015
We've been married for about 11 years. Two daughters. We used to be best friends, playing together, talking and working on things together, encouraging and helping each other in our hobbies. About eight years ago, she starts dealing with Depression. I didn't respond to it as I should have. I got resentful, bitter, angry. This ended up driving a wedge into our marriage. Children complicated this; her Depression left her without the energy and drive to do all that needed to get done, so I either picked up the slack or the things simply didn't get done in a timely manner. My resentment only grew.
Couple of years ago, I finally came to grips that I needed to be more encouraging and supportive of my wife. However, I was still rather short-tempered and would easily become upset over trivial things. Instead of using patience and long-suffering, I would only raise my voice (since they obviously didn't hear me the first five times). So now my kids only know that if they want to be heard, they need to yell at each other.
She tells me that I need help for an Anger Management problem. I likely do need the help. I've been making gains in keeping it under control. Then she tells me that I'm verbally abusive, or have been, and that she's had enough. She wants Legal Separation for a time, give us a cooling off period, and allow us to work out our issues on our own.
Thing is, I don't want to leave. I will if it means it will salvage our relationship and our family (and maybe this is God's way of working hard issues out of our lives), but I'd prefer to stay. So, for the next three weeks until I have to be out, I have taken it upon myself to start the 40-day challenge. Even if we sign the papers and it happens, I am committed to seeing this through. I have three weeks to give her a pleasant and cordial experience. We're both committed to making this as drama-free as we can (basically, not making it worse than it already is). Having lost my wedding band ages ago, I purchased a Tungsten band the other day. She asked why I would start wearing it now.
I told her: "The best time to plant a tree is twenty years ago. The second-best time to plant a tree is now." I have not treated her right for quite some time, but it's not too late to start.

Keep us in your prayers, as we will need all the help we can get. She deserves better, the children deserve better, and with God's help, we can make this work.

Ian



5/18/2015
5/10/2015

I got married to the girl I have been on and off again for 10 yrs, A yr and a half into our marriage something changed. We both started listening to our friends, and lost the way to communicate and talk to each other, it always lead to big fights. I have been seperatednow for almost 3 yrs, and divorced for almost a year, we recently started talking again, and had even hung out. My advice is NEVER give up on this LOVE DARE challenge, I am still following this love dare even tho we are divorced and I can tell you IT WORKS.... NEVER GIVE UP ON LOVE, Love is the key and power to all, with out it, u will not be urself, nor will u be happy.... thank you




4/29/2015
I have been married for 10 months, and I haven't been the man I promsed to be on the altar. My wife has lost hope and faith my ability to me to change the person I am. But I'm going to do this and change my marriage for the better, I am going to treat her and love her better for the rest of our lives. I will do this, This will work.




4/28/2015
We have been together since 2011. Our relationship began with an amazing spark. A connection like no other. and for the next couple of years we had a son and our relationship continuted to bloom and become better and better. Then in 2013 our relationship took a turn for the worst. I lied to my fiance about money that we were expecting to have but we weren't going to have (thats a whole differenty story). This in return broke the trust of my fiance and since then he has been a changed man. He isn't into me as much as he used to be. He doesn't want to make love and be together in that sense. He isn't very affectonate at all to me. He pretty much just goes through the motions of what a couple is supposed to do in a relationship. Outside of the relationship tho he reaches out to other women a lot. I have read messages from them and with them he is the man that he once used to be with me. He is outgoing, flirtatious, affectonate, and a gentleman. His actions however are unpure because he is in a commited relationship with me and stepping out of this relationship to get the feelings he is missing in ours. I had a semi open conversation with him about our sex life today and while i feel like i could sit down and cry I know that wont help anything and we have to work at our relationship and find god to fix this. I have been sitting around asking what to do how to fix this and have been asking myself this for a long time. then i realized there is nothing that i can fix unless i turn to god and do as I am supposed to. So this is my now givnig myself to god 100% from this day forward. working on becoming a better person, a better fiance and an overall better me. I am praying our relationship works and we can be the couple that we once were. This is going to be the hardest 40 days of my life and then after this because you can't stop at 40. You have to continue this each and every day and I will do my best. I feel like this is my last shot at fixing my relationship..

Kaitlin



4/26/2015
My wife and i have been together for 11 years we have 2 wonderful children that we both love completely. About a year ago my wife started dealing with depression she told me and she went to a doctor For medication. She has been a bit of a roller coster since there were days she seemed to love me more than ever before and days she just wanted to be alone. Before this past Christmas I experienced a great loss and started medicating myself after a month i realised i had a problem and started the process of quiting once done i went to my wife and told her about the issue her response was she did not want to be married to me any more. For the next week i was angry with her i thought my honesty was a good thing. She told me it was a long time coming and this was just the last straw. Over the next 6 weeks i changed alot anything i could do to vet her attention i did. This did not help at all and she started seeing someone. This someone turned out to be a "friend" of mine someone my wife had never meet but heard me talk about him he recently went through divorce and i confided in him. Well once i found out and the truth came out the relasionship stopped. Now i feel as if im back to square 1 she wants to leave i want her to stay. I have been served divorce papers and are final date is only 2 months away. Wr get along better right now than we have in years we listen to each other we talk daily i feel as if there is no way this is not fixable but she continually says the love we have is more that of a family member not a husband type of love. I want to take the dare because i will attemp anything to make this work. Please pray for us..

kevin



4/18/2015
My fiancé and I are high school sweethearts. We have been together for 8 years. Our Wedding was just less than 3 months away when I got a knock on my front door from a man claiming that his wife and my fiancé had an affair together. I didn't want to believe it. My fiancé was always the kindest man. Always looking out for others, so patient and loving. He fit right into my family from day one. Everyone loved him. There was no way this was true. But it was. The next few days were absolute hell on earth for me. I had to face him and hear the story, face my family and deal with their anger, and face my wedding and having to cancel every last bit of it that I had poured my heart into planning for the last year and a half. I had to make a decision, was I going to work on forgiving him and continue with our relationship, or was I going to call it quits and walk away like everyone was advising me to? I decided to stay. His remorse was evident and his efforts in fixing this nightmare were showing. He admitted this affair meant nothing and only lasted for a week. He had no idea why it happened and it scared him that he did not recognize this person he had become in a matter of a week. Although this didn't take my pain away, it helped me to know that the man I loved and once trusted was still there somewhere, and I just needed to find him again.

He and I began meeting. We met with a couple of priests for counsel and began getting therapy. Against my family's support, he and I began meeting in our church parking lot each night for scripture, prayer, and reflection. On day four of our prayers nights, I mentioned the Love Dare. He immediately agreed and we bought the book. I am praying that this book and these dares will help to heal us, and help us to move beyond this nightmare. Pray for us as we pray for all those taking on this Love Dare.




4/14/2015
My husband and I have been married for 6 1/2 years but living together for 8 1/2 years. This is both our 2nd marriage. Recently my husband has become distant and yesterday(4/13/2015) he stuns me with an "I don't want to be married anymore!" His prior marriage lasted for 15 years before he realized that he was in it for all the wrong reasons. My first marriage lasted for 4 years before realizing that I was in it for all the wrong reasons. He has voiced his feelings of resent towards me for not making him my priority, all the while he was making me his priority. He claims that my friends and family are more important to me than he is but in my defense, I don't see them often.
My husband has been working long hours in the past few months and we hardly have anytime to spend together. When he has time, I have something else going on and vise verse. One thing is evident , that my drinking alcohol,has become the center of our issues. Since I met him, I have slowed down substantially, and do it on occasions. But those occasions have come to the fore front and, he keeping his feelings bottled up, has finally combusted and damage has been done beyond repair. He says he has nothing left and that he's DONE!
I LOVE my husband very much and take care of my household very well. I take care of my elderly mother in law, and the kids, as well as go to school full time, and hold down a job. He always has clean clothes, a hot meal when he gets home from work, and I make sure the bills are paid each month, as well as do wifely duties sexually.
I don't want my marriage to end. But some how he doesn't want to go to counseling, and he doesn't want to give me another chance to prove to him that I can make this right again. He says he's not kicking me out and I don't have to rush moving my stuff out. But eventually I will have to move out. My daughter is a senior in high school and is set to graduate in May. This is devastating to me, and I am willing to do whatever it takes to save marriage. I even told him I will quit drinking, I will stop my occasional friends and family visits to save my marriage. I have already begun by clearing out all the alcohol in my house and contacting friends and letting them know I can't visit anymore. I LOVE MY HUSBAND and everything I do is with him as a priority.
I asked him to give me until my daughters graduation to prove to him that he is my priority. So in this time I am going to do the LOVE DARE without his knowledge, and expressed to him that if after my daughters graduation that he still feels the same way then he can file for divorce and I won't fight it.
So I am asking anyone and everyone to please pray for us, as I will be praying for us as well, that the love dare mends our broken hearts.


Michele



4/3/2015
My wife and I were married 2.5 years ago on the happiest day of my life. I love her so very much and can not -nor wish to- imagine my life without her. Unfortunately, our marriage has had its struggles and I have spoken very hard and angry words to her that I very much regret. We have been separated for three months and she has recently filed for divorce.

I am currently on Day 8 of the challenge. My beloved wife is is aware of the Love Dare and has asked me to stop. I absolutely believe with every ounce of my spirit that God intended our marriage to last until death do us part but she unwilling to discuss reconciliation. I am supposed to be meeting with a lawyer this week but do not want to go down that path as I believe that it will only increase the hostility. I am conflicted about whether to stop the Love Dare in order to honour her request, or continue it as I believe I am acting under God's authority.

I have made many changes, am in counselling, and my relationship with God is the strongest it has ever been. I am continuing to hope and pray for our Heavenly Father to whisper to my sweetheart.




Christian



3/21/2015
My wife and I have been married for nearly 14 years and during that time I have been trying to find a full time job, but had been working contract positions so I have had some work. I have had many experiences that have place a great burden on me or a least I felt that way.
My doubt and frustrations have manifested in me not being the greatest of person's to live with, easy to anger, saying things in a rude way at times, hurtful, and at times disrespectful to my wife and kids.

Our sexual relationship has become none existent and I started to join date sites anomalously to see if I could find that spark that I was missing. Talking to woman and sending them pictures of myself naked. But I never went beyond that, I never cheated on my wife with intimacy, and realized that I making a mistake, so I stopped and didn't dispose of the evidence which she found one day on my computer.

I have seen the movie a couple of times and knew that I needed to do something different if I wanted to save my marriage, to have a loving marriage that we both wanted and deserved. So I have taken up the challenge to follow through with the 40 day love dare.

I know that even if it is not able to save my marriage that it will give me the tools to be a better person to those around me everyday, those individuals that come and go into my life. To help me to overcome my short falls of being hurtful, disrespectful and impatient.

justin



3/21/2015
My bf and i are having problem. He's too correct, intelligent and so on. Im having issues with my personality and my selfconfidence, so.. Sometimes i push him away and treat him bad being arrogant, i treat bad the people who's around me, my anger gets the power on myself and im so impulsive. My bf is being patience with me but i think i dont deserve him because he lost his dignity with me and i dont appreciate that. We're having problems almost everyday and it's totally difficult for me to say "im so sorry". I did it before, but sometimes (most of them) i dont believe myself, he forgives me but im tired of me being so wrong with him. I wanna change and i realize the i need God. I really dont wanna lose him. Love is not selfish but i really dont wanna lose him cause i wanna fight with my demons and show them nothing material or shallow is more important than him.




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