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10/22/2009
My wife and I have been married 7yrs and have two beautiful girls. We separated a few weeks ago and she said she is done and has made up her mind. I left out of anger and frustration after she told me if I walked out the door it was over. I feel like I can never make her happy no matter what I do. I dont yell or cuss at her. I have always treated her with respect. I dont drink or smoke. I go to work and come home to my family. I help with the cooking cleaning and taking care of girls. I strayed away from God and her a few years ago and started talking to another girl. I almost wanted to get caught because I wanted her attention. It seems like I am always the last thing on her mind. I am the one who calls or text her during the day to see how she is doing or just picking up lunch for her or buying that little something special to brighten her day. Every holiday I love to go all out and see her smile when she opens her gift. It makes me feel so good. When it comes to Fathers day, Birthdays Christmas etc. for me I am either flat out ignored or its done at the last minute with the attitude of I guess I have to. This was the main reason I strayed a few years ago. This Fathers day she was so worried about throwing going away party for girl at work and didnt get me anything for Fathers day. I would have loved for her just to have girls make me a card or something little. I feel so selfish when I get these feelings but it hurts to no end wondering and backtracking everyday searching for something said or done wrong. I was so jealous of my brother in law who is a lying cheating abusive alcoholic to my sister. my sister did all kinds of things for him. I lied to friends and family about what she got me for Fathers day so she would not look bad. My birthday rolled around august 30th and again last minute gift a cheap coffee pot. What? I dont drink coffee. Again, my mind went back to searching for the moment that I did something wrong. I started to build my walls around my heart and mind and getting same feelings of desperation for attention again. I was not going to stoop to that level again and go behind her back. She asked me to be honest with her and I told her I was unhappy and explained why. Of course, she brings up past and I dont expect her to forgive me in so little time. She gave me ultimatum and I let my pride get best of me. I left. I love her with all my heart. I dont eat or sleep. Ive lost about 20lbs since separated because nothing stays down. I remember seeing her in high school and realizing she was the one. She didnt know I existed until a few years later. I asked her if she wanted book and said she didnt know but it was better than no, so I left copy in her car one morning and when I go in the morning to get my girls ready for school I see a bookmark in it. I am on day 4 and trudging along wondering when she will start it. I have to learn to be patient and give her some space. Some conversations are good and some she just wont even talk to me. She asked me to stop saying I love you and being nice to her. Its hard not to say I love you but I respected her wishes. I wont be mean to her and will do the Love Dare no matter what. I am by no means a holyroller and I am learning again to let God take control of this. My girls need to have their mom and dad together. I dont want us to be another stat. She is the one I want to grow old with. I pray every night and alot during day asking God for forgiveness and all I want is for her to be happy even if that means us not being together. I know we were meant to be together. please pray for my family.
10/21/2009
Last night during a DivorceCare meeting, several people suggested the book Love Dare to me. We've been married for 4 1/2 years and have a 2 yr-old daughter. It has been one month since my wife made her intentions to divorce me clear. She plans to move out of our house on December 1st which is exactly 40 days away. I found this to be more than just coincidence, so I stopped by the bookstore on the way home and picked up Love Dare. Before I heard about this book I was dreading the next 40 days, but now I'm looking forward to the opportunity to show my wife the love that we've been taking for granted these last few years. Today is Day 1...
Jason
10/20/2009
Hi,
Like many of you my marriage is failing, or it feels like it. I am young only 21 and have been married 3 years this February to a guy who used to be my best friend. We have 2 children less than a years apart, both toddlers. He was such a great guy at first and it was me who would scream and yell and say horrible things to him. I suffer from severe mental illness... schizophrenia. It makes our marriage worse than it is. Once we got married he started to become violent and the roles switched. Now he calls me the horrible names and says I'm worthless and I do nothing. The worst part about it is that everyone is watching. Everybody knows because less than a year ago we lost both of our children when I called the cops on him during an argument and our house was a disaster. I made the mistake of bailing him out with him promising to be better. He was when we made our first move in december. our second move, signing a new lease on our 2 year anniversary is when trouble started. Since then, there is no good. I suspect him of selling pills, I drink regularly, we both argue constantly, he hits and I hit, I even made the mistake of thinking that better could be as close as down the street and began a too-close relationship with his best friend, our neighbor. He still doesn't know everything. We watched the movie together. Suggested it to many in trouble like us. He refuses to have any part of it saying we are just fine and things will be better and that he will change. It never happens. I'm doing this on my own hoping that if I just change maybe he will too, and maybe it will last and maybe... just maybe, if we can remember how to be friends again then the rest of it will just come natural like it did in the beginning. wish me luck, I'm really going to need it.
10/20/2009
We have been married for 10 years. About 6 months ago he told me he was not "in love" with me anymore. Then he wanted to talk about our relationship in a worst case senario. We then did not talk about it for 3 months. They we talked again last week. He does not want to try counciling. He does not even seem to try. I had accepted the marriage thinking that this is just how he is - no displays of affection. I was ignoring the obvious. I just finished watching Fireproof and am going to start reading the Love Dare tonight. I know he is not totally to blame but I won't give up.
Victoria
10/19/2009
I am picking up this book today - I have been searching for something to save my relationship with the woman I love with my whole being. I feel God put us together. Please help me with your prayers to at least get her to look at what we could be together. that is all I ask and pray for. Just to try! Just try
Don
10/19/2009
My husband and I have been married almost 7 years. For the past two years I have been unhappy with myself. All this time he has tried to make me happy and he feels like he has failed. We have grown apart and just need to get back to us. I saw the movie and immidiately bought the book. I don't want to give up on us. I don't want our two girls to have only a mom or a dad at certain times of the week. He has proved these last two years how much he has and does love me. Now it is my turn. I hope that reading this and doing the dare proves to him that I have always loved him. I hope this also helps me be the wife that God intended for me to be.
Laura
10/19/2009
My husband I and I just got married in Aug of this year. Last week, I found some inappropriate emails and pictures between him and another girl. I wanted to just give up since this was not the first nor the second time this had happened. I told him everything was over that there were no more chanced. I am giving him one more chance and its because he brought up the idea about reading and doing "Fireproof." We are now on day 6 and I can already see and feel a difference already. Please pray this growth continues!
10/17/2009
i been married since 1992 at a young age. have 3 daughters and weve been legally seperated since 4/2008. hes been in and out of the home twice since htat time. i saw the movie last year and thought this is what we need to help us since therapy wasnt... i baight the love dare book for him to do, because at the time it was " all his fault" he had broke so many rules of marrage and our hearts...he didnt do the book but a few days and gave up...no much effort on his part. well ...somehoe we got back together and things were not going so god and i ran across his emty book i gavehim and decided i was not goingto say anything to him but I was going to take the love dare. Im 17 days in to it and it is not easy, but it has been a blessing to keep my heart and mind focused as i try to lead them to what i believe is worth it to save our marraige... i even put the house on the market for sale two months ago and we are living seperate lives in the same residence and i want him here with me and the girls as it should be. this is really my last chance emotiaonly icant handle any more. i read others stories and messages and it gives me hope. I will be praying for us all! GOd bless!
jennifer
10/17/2009
I've been married for 3 years to my second husband. He has adopted my 5 year old son and we have a 20 month old son together. I'm on day 9 of the Love Dare. I've been doing it for about 3 weeks now but my husband works out of town sometimes and its hard to keep up so I just pray and repeat the days that I'm able to do. I'm having a really hard time. I am a born again Christian and I lived a long time without God in my life. My husband doesn't believe in worshiping a God and he makes me feel stupid for being so devoted, but I'm learning to overcome that problem. He knows that I'm doing the Love Dare and everytime I do something out of love whether it be an exercise or not he sarcastically asks "Did the book tell you to do that?". I will not give up, I will let God live through me and show others how wonderful his love and mercy are. Please pray for me that I can let go of my selfish ways and make it through the 40 days successfully. I refuse to go through another divorce. Thank you!
Britney
10/16/2009
Were to start, my wife Trisha and I have been married for 15 years (our second marriage each) and we have been together for 16 years. together we have 2 children I have (3) from my prior and she has (1) from her prior marriage. I have just ordered the fireproof kit and the love dare hoping that this will fix our marriage which I do not believe to be badly broken, I do believe, (as her parents and our older childeren do), that it is just the normal stress and strains of life with kids, ex's etc. She had told me for about a year now that she has not been happy and has not felt close to me and recently told me that she loves me but is not in love with me. There are no extra marrital affairs, alcoholic or drug problems and we do not have domestic vviolanece issues. We have had past heated arguments which were mostly related to stresses and influences outside of our marriage, but nothing recent.
She also recently told me that she is not sure what is wrong with her and believes that it is mostly her being unhappy and she thinks we need to seperate. I love her with all my heart and I do not want her to leave as I have told her, she and the kids are my whole life. I believe that she is going through a medical mid-life crisis as many people do and I believe that if we can get right with God we could get right with each other and repair our marriage.
We both saw the movie when it first came out and we both loved it, so I went and bought it today for us to watch again and start (hopefully our new life putting God first, together)
I don't believe that we have survived all the past outside influences and drama for the past 16 years of our marriage, when our life together is finally our own, (no ex's) so that it could fall apart. I ordered the fireproof kit and the Love Dare kit today and I am hoping she stays in the house long enough for us to make it work.
Chris
10/15/2009
I met my fiance about a year and half ago. We have gone through some very difficult times. Questioning our commitment to each other. In learning about each other, we did things very wrong. He was very angry, impatient, harsh, mean at times and emotionally closed off. I took this as him being a mean person and with a cold heart. I left him and was determined to move on. We found that our love was very strong towards each other and made promises to each other that we vowed to honor and keep. Needless to say, we fell back into our old patterns, even after counseling. I left him again. I didn't just leave him, I packed up all my stuff and left while he was at work and didn't even tell him (did that both times). We went for a few months and didn't really talk or see each other. Somehow, God brought us together and although we both did some awful things to each other, we have a better understanding as to how we react inappropriately to each other. We are back together and know in our hearts that we want to be together. We are learning to put our pride and self-centerdness aside and focus on our partner.
The other night we watched Fireproof the movie and I was moved by how close it hit home to our situation. This is something to definately watch again and again and not forget our own part in a relationship.
10/15/2009
I told my best friend that my wife of 10 years and I were having trouble. He told me that he had recently seen Fireproof and recommended it to me. I watched it last night and I could put myself in the movie! My wife tells me that she has fallen out of love with me and feels no intimacy with me and feels that she never will again. I bought the Love Dare book last night and am currently on dare 1. We have so many issues in our marriage that I want to talk about, but she doesn't think are problems, which cause fights between us. The other day she stopped being mad and we had a real heart to heart about the fact that we may seperate and ultimately divorce. We have 2 beautiful children, 8 and 6, that I worry about constantly. I don't want separation or divorce, but it seems to be sneaking up on me, she is very stubborn. I am going to take the dare to be right with God and hope and pray that she can see me change into the man I never have been and maybe she will be willing to do the same. I pray for my family and need some prayers for me also..... Reading these stories make me reailze I am not in this alone and they do give me more hope than I had yesterday. God Bless.
Jim
Jim
10/14/2009
My husband and I have been married 7 1/2 years. Up until six weeks ago, I thought things were pretty good. Sure, we've had some rough spots, but all in all, I thought we had a strong marriage. Many of our friends wish they had the marriage we had. Six weeks ago, I found out he cheated on me. We watched FireProof the day after I found out he had been unfaithful, and held each other, crying, after it was over. I forgave him, and was working on trusting him again, even though he cannot forgive himself, and thinks God won't forgive him. I thought things were going well. Saturday, he told me he wants a divorce, and has for the last year. I love him with all my heart, and do not want to spend a single day without him, let alone the rest of my life. My sister is sending me a copy of The Love Dare. Even though he insists it is over, I'm hoping that the book will not only save our marriage, but help me find myself again, after 10 years of worrying only about his happiness. I will also be attending church on Sunday, for the first time in 20 years, and totally losing my faith in God for the last four years.
I know that it will be rough, as he says he has no desire to try to work things out, but I'm willing to do whatever it takes to honor my wedding vows.
Please pray for us.
Kara
10/14/2009
I am a firefighter I have been with my girlfriend katie for one year. I watched fireproof for the first time and after the second time it was like it was me in that movie and i also had people told me iam like Caleb and I have realized iam i act like him and talk like him and we have a daughter together and i want to make this work so iam wanting to start the love dare and make it work and i think it will
terry
10/13/2009
I am in a confused stage right now. It's been month ago that I found out my husband was cheating on me. The worst part about it is that he confused it has been going on for 7 yrs. It doesn't stop there he decided he was going to move out and go live with her. He says he loves her and he loves me too but then he also says his love for me is just from a distance. I just don't know what to think and do. I have moved out too and rented my own apt. with my three children. I still see him alomst everyday because he sees my children plus he assist in coaching their soccer teams. It is very hard to see him and not react. I have been giving him a hard time and have said some pretty mean things. I have even done things to make him angry but it's because of all the pain I feel inside. He lived a double life for seven yrs. We have been married for almost 11 yrs. He's lived a lie for more than half of our marriage! I am devestated, hurt, humiliated and feel used. I always did everything he wanted in our marriage, still that was not good enough for him. I stayed home with my 3 kids til they went to school. I had them alomst 2yrs apart, so I had my hands full. I had them really close together because that's what he wanted. I feel betrayed and stupid. I watched fireproof tonight, of course only with my children because he not here. It really touched me and I wish he could watch it. I am just confused in what I should do. Part of me wants to try the dare love book and part of me doesn't. I am just going to pray and ask God to show me. I'm scared of being rejected. I already feel rejected! Please help me pray. I want to make the right choice.
10/13/2009
We met online about 10 years ago and were married shortly after. It’s been 8 years married now and most of our marriage has been less than happy or fulfilling for us both. We have two young daughters who take up much of our attention and energy. I have hit rock bottom recently and to the point of having an affair. I completely regret what I have done and wish only for forgiveness from my husband. He thankfully has given me a second chance and I am still struggling with my temper, and determining what love truly is. Being reluctant to watch the movie my mother in law gave us, we finally broke down and watched it last night. By the end we were both in tears sobbing. The light bulb has come on, now the true work begins. I am going to begin my 40 day journey today when I pick up the book at the store and hopefully find God in the process. I know in my heart that he wants more than anger, fighting, and impatience for us as a couple and a family. I can only hope that we can come together on an even playing field and grow as a loving couple for our girls and each other. Please wish us luck.
10/13/2009
I am completely in love with the man of my dreams and he is a firefighter but it seems that his time is more focused on other things and he has told me numerous times that his main priority in his life now is the fire department. I'm in a constant state of worry and panic when his tones drop. I have loved Ryan since I first laid eyes on him. We are both very young he is 22 and I am 21, and was together for awhile but a falling out put us in the "akward friend zone". We have talked about getting back together and both agreed that it would be best to wait everything out to see if a relationship will work with his new lifestyle. I have decided to take the "Love Dare" to try to bring romance back to us and show him that no matter what I'll always be there and will always love him. I pray everynight for this to bring us together like we used to be. No, Ryan and I are not married and no, we have no children but the love is there. It just needs to be sparked again. I hope and pray that the "Love Dare" works.
Samantha
10/12/2009
My Husband and I have been together for almost 13 years and married 10 years- We have 3 little girls together - Our relationship has not been perfect to say the least- affairs- - trust- money issues - and the run of the mill difficulties with having children- no time for each other. Our family lives far away so it is difficult to get any time together-
WELL>>>
After Counseling on his part= and going to church as a family we started to get better- Things were looking up and now I feel that we are back to square 1 and struggling to survive- We as a family have stopped going to church and now I'm the one in counseling Last Valentines Day we watched Fireproof together- not knowing what the movie was about - we thought it was about a firefighter- action movie NOT about relationships
When we watched it he laughed at it the whole time - saying what bad acting it was- funny thing about it - We were married in Albany GA -Our first daughter was born in Phoebe Putney Memorial Hospital- I thought it was God directing us - trying to put us on the path toward God and a healthy realationship
Well as mushie as I am I rewatched it today after my husband said he doesn't know me anymore and how I don't trust him- I am and have been trying to trust him since the affair- It is hard - apart of me was lost- when I found out... it felt like my heart was ripped out of my chest and stompped on- Now there is a trust factor that has been hard to deal with lately-
Because...
Currently, He is in at a live in training academy 5 out of the 7 days -This is something I've supported him in doing for almost 10 years- and he has been gone since July and Lately I feel that he is just coming home because of an obligation to his children- I don't feel his heart is here with me- I've talked with him about it and we promised to work on things last weekend - THEN I did something I regret- I stole his cell phone to make sure he was not cheating again - Of course he found out... and now He says he doesn't trust me and that our relationship will not survive- because I will never let the affair go...
He came home this weekend - I've apologized over and over... cried over and over... but ... he couldn't hug me or kiss me without me asking - wouldn't even sleep in the same bed as me - wouldn't even hold my hand without me asking - He wants space and time to figure things out- I often wonder when I stopped being good enough for him - and our marriage-
******
SO 40 DAY LOVE DARE - I've ordered you TODAY you should be here in about 3 bus. days- I want to save my marriage not just because of our children but because I truly love him and I told him if he wants out I will understand but I will do everything in my power to show him that I love him and Pray that with Gods help and guidence we will not only SURVIVE But we will THRIVE in our marriage and grow old and happy togehter- with GOD's love and blessings- I ask if you could say a pray for us - it's much needed
Much Love - Kelly
Kelly
10/12/2009
My husband and I have been married 10 years and been together 14. I was tipped that my husband was being unfaithful about 6 months ago. This has always been a fear of mine. He is a drinker and I don't trust him when we are not together when he does. We had a child two years ago after five years of infertility. It was a emotional rollercoaster for the both of us. When our child was born he was sick and he required my full attention which in turn led me to neglect my husband. He begin spending a lot of time away from home and we rarely spent any time together. I didn't notice because I was exhaust all the time and frankly did not have the energy to care what or who he did things with. Bad mistake!! After I was tipped I checked his cellphone and found numerous texts, emails from two girls. After hiring a detective I found nothing more, but I found out more about the identity of the girls. I say girls because that are young enough to be my husbands daughters. I confronted him with this and he denies everything or anything. I just feel it in my gut that he was unfaithful. I don't need to know detail but I am stressed that he is still seeing them. I have been praying and am reading the Love Dare book and I have seen God work in our lives already. It is humbling to find that I have been so wrong and selfish in alot of things. I don't take what he did as my fault but I definitely didn't help things. I am just continually praying that God can heal our marriage and my husbands alcohol problems. I think he is overworked and stressed and uses it as a release. I am although sad to know there are many young girls out there that would go after a man old enough to be their Dad. I am sure it is about money and gifts but have some respect for yourself ladies!!
10/11/2009
Nine months ago I reunited with the father of my 16 year old child. Ours is a true love story....or is it? I had not heard from him or seen him in 16 years. He called me in January to apologize for his past, the way he treated me and my son and for not being a part of our lives. He told me he was in touch with God and that his life was better and part of his continued journey was to reach out to me and ask for forgiveness. He was my first love and when I heard his voice and what he said; well I wanted to see it for myself. I made plans to visit with him and reintroduce him to the son he hadn't seen in 15 years. We met in his home town in early February ~ a blessing for us all. We've been seeing one another since but lately our relationship has taken a terrible turn. I found a text message he sent to this exwife saying "I desire you @##" I was heart broken. I thought I was the only one. He told me he sent the message because he was lonely and that we had been fighting too much. We live in different states and the distance has also become a factor. He told me that he loves me and that he was sorry. He said I should trust God and his message. I have been trying to repair our relationship for weeks. Trying to believe in Gods message. Tonight I watched Fireproof and I feel like God was speaking to me. This movie was a miracel message. I need to learn to be patient. Trust God and his word. Trust the love that is in front of me by being a stronger, kinder, gentler person.
Thank God for this movie. It may have saved the love I have!
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