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5/13/2009
I haven't actually started the 40 Day Love Dare yet. I have always loved my wife, tried to make her feel special and beautiful. I've always tried to respect her and give her what she needs to feel secure. But 10 days ago she had suddenly changed and was cold to me and its continued each day. She won't tell me me she loves me when I tell her I love her. She wont even talk to me unless I initiate a conversation. She is just now telling me after 9 years of marriage that she's ready to leave, that she's shut down emotionally a long time ago... this was all a shock to me, I never even expected this. We even saw the Fireproof movie in the theater and she never indicated anything to me about her feelings or that we were having a communication issue? I keep telling her that I love her, that when we wed that the committment I made to her was till death due us part, and through good times and bad, etc. and that I am going to try to win her heart back. But she didn't even say anything... I told her I love her and her answer was, "I know...".
I've asked her in a non-offensive way if she's involved physically or emotionally with someone else, possibly at her work (like in the movie), but she says she isn't. I told her that the grass isn't greener on the other side... that we just need to fertilize and water the grass and she told me that sometimes you have to set the ones you love free and if they come back then it was meant to be... this hurts me so bad! I can't just let the woman I love go...
I just keep praying but nothing seems to be happening... she's refusing to go to counceling... I just want her to love me again... I'm wi
I could use some prayers... will you please pray for me and my wife Sophia?
Joe
5/13/2009
HI MY NAME IS CATHERINE (JUST LIKE THE LADY IN FIRE PROOF, WHICH I FIND FUNNY) AND I HAVE BEEN MARRIED ALMOST 15 YEARS AND YES WE HAVE HAD OUR UPS AND DOWNS TOO. IT SEEMS LIKE MORE DOWNS THEN UPS. THE MOVIE FIRE PROOF HAS OPENED MY EYES TO THE FACT THAT IN REALITY MY MARRIAGE IS SOMEWHAT LIKE THE COUPLE IN THE MOVIE. I HAVE NOT GOT THE BOOK YET BUT I AM STILL GOING TO TAKE THE LOVE DARE CHALLENGE BY THE EXAMPLES I SEEN KIRK USE IN THE MOVIE. I JUST WANT YOU ALL TO PRAY THAT THE LORD WILL GIVE ME THE STRENGTH I NEED. WE HAVE 2 SONS AND I WANT THEM TO SEE MOM AND DAD GETTING ALONG INSTEAD OF FUSSING OVER THINGS THAT REALLY NOT WORTH FUSSING OVER IN THE FIRST PLACE. YES I LOVE MY HUSBAND AND WE HAVE THOUGHT ABOUT SEPARTING A FEW TIMES, BUT AFTER SEEING THE MOVIE I KNOW NOW MORE THAN EVER THAT OUR MARRIAGE IS WORTH FIGHTING FOR. HE IS THE ONLY MAN I WANT TO BE WITH AND TO GROW OLD WITH. SO PLEASE PRAY FOR ME AS I BEGIN THIS DARE (ONCE I DO FINALLY BUY THE LOVE DARE BOOK I AM STARTING OVER FROM DAY ONE). I BELIEVE IF ALL OF US THAT WANT TO SAVE OUR MARRIAGES WOULD STICK TOGETHER AND PRAY FOR EACH OTHER WE WILL BE SUPRISED WITH THE OUTCOME. BECAUSE LIKE THEY SAY WHERE 2 OR 3 ARE GATHERED IN HIS NAME HE IS IN THE MIST. I WILL KEEP YOU ALL IN MY PRAYS BECAUSE MARRIAGES ARE WORTH FIGHTING FOR.
THANK YOU AND MAY GOD BLESS US ALL ON THIS JOURNEY
LOVE IN CHRIST
CATHERINE
CATHERINE
5/11/2009
Well I was sure my wife was going to move out the other day. She told me a few days ago and gave me a date. The day before the move was supposed to happen we had a long conversation. Mostly it was me talking to her. The next morning came and she is still living with myself and our two children. We had a big hug that morning. I told her I loved her. I know she does not feel the same about me. I told her that also, but I would continue to tell her that I love her. I have been completing the love dare for about two weeks now and am going to continue. I have not given up on her or the hope that things will get better between us. I asked in a earlier story for everyone to pray for us. I believe that all of you are part of the reason why she did not leave me yet. We still have a long way to go but with the lord entering more into my life as I complete the love dare I know that anything is possible. I keep feeling that I cannot go on with this any longer, but I truly love my wife and want to spend the rest of my life with her. I know that it will be god's wish if that were to happen. I also know that I need to work with him for that to happen. I will continue because when I feel like giving up he gives me a sign to say keep going. I want to thank everyone for the prayers and I will update you on how its going.
Thank you God for giving my life direction.
5/11/2009
I have been married for eight years. And although the first three years were a struggle, we pulled through and made it work. We recently bought the movie Fireproof, and we both watched it and it touched me. I bought the book and am awaiting its arrival. Our marriage is good so far, we love each other very much. My only problem is my jealousy. I struggle the most with this feeling. I have had women tell my husband he needs to leave me because I don't treat him right. I show my husband my love for him as much as I can and he says he has fallen in love with me all over again, but I stumbled upon an e-mail where he confessed his love to another woman. I don't know what to do! I so want to grow old with him, I can't see myself with anyone else. I only hope that the Love Dare will help me to show my husband how much I love and care for him and that I wont feel threatened by the women he talks to online. I try not to feel bitter, but its so hard when I feel like everyone he talks to online is a threat. Please Pray for me and my husband that we will grow only closer in our marriage and that our love will grow, not diminish. Thankyou and God Bless.
5/10/2009
Hello, my name is Jonathan. I recently seen fireproof and it has opened my eyes to say the least. We have been married now for the last 5 years and have had 2 wonderful children.
Our relationship has had it's share of ups and downs as well. 2 months ago, my wife left me and took our kids. About six weeks ago to the day my father came into town to visit us. He was very surprised and saddened to hear that she had left with our children. I believe it was just like Kirk Cameron's dad in the movie that my father also was a very vital part of helping me see what i needed to see, and hear what i needed to hear.
For the sake of my father and his wanting to see his grandkids, my wife agreed to come let him see them everyday. She was very shocked to see that the house was cleaned everyday she knew i was alone. (for I truly felt like i was doing enough by providing for our family's financial needs) But i truly didn't understand in full extent what i had done nor what i was doing differently. Until I seen Fireproof. It was very ironic to hear myself in the movie. It brought me to tears and really opened my eyes to the parasites and all the things that can come between spouces.
I am happy to say that she has decided to come home to me with the children. I can only hope and pray that I have been forgiven and my eyes opened to the power of the Lord Jesus Christ. Amen.
Jonathan
5/10/2009
I have been married to my husband for 9 1/2 years. I love my husband so much and God knows that. My husband became ill in September of last year and we have struggled so much. I have struggled so much. I am a full time student and a mother of three children ages 6, 5, and 2. I am thankful that God has blessed me with my family but I had a hard time realizing that for a long time. I am taking the dare because I want God to show me how I can be a better wife, which I have not always been. I know that I can be a better wife and I am sure that the dare will help me with that.
God Bless You All!!!
Mindy
5/9/2009
My husband and I have been married 6 years this November. We have 3 beautiful children together. In October "I" decided that I wanted to seperate for awhile. Horrible mistake!! I wasnt happy because things were bad at home, i wanted them to be better I just quit putting forth the effort because I didnt think he did anymore. Well I turned to alcohol then things really got bad. I quit spending time with my children & taking care of my home. I felt I didnt have a family anymore why care. Yes it was my decision, my husband works in the oilfeild and is away from home alot. Well during the seperation I filled for a divorce because I had met someone else, thank god i slept through the divorce hearing. A few days after the scheduled hearing my brother calls & says he wanted to meet with me and my husband so we agreed. He says " hear me out and do me one last favor as my sister and brother-in-law. watch this (the movie "FireProof") together this evening. My husband and i agreed to watch it at our seperate homes, but we would watch it. Well it really hit home in my heart but I just brushed it off and continued with my crazy life. Well it is now 4 months later & I watched it agian at the same brothers home & this time Im not brushing it off. I am determined to give this "LoveDare" a shot for myself, my husband and our children. Please keep us in your prayers because I am you.
5/7/2009
My husband and I will be married 3 years in July, and we have a son who will be 4 in a few months. I have been attending nursing school for the last 2 years, which has put pressure on our marriage. The past year has been horrible. It started earlier, but the worst of it started May 16th, my husband was in an accident, he smashed his truck after drinking who knows how much. He smashed the right side of his face, and I thought this was an awakening for him, however in December I found this was just the beginning. In November things had gotten pretty bad, my husband wasn't coming home, and he just didn't really care about anything, and he slept all day. Money was disappearing more than before, and then he didn't come home at all one day. I made calls to his friends which are stationed in Washington state awaiting deployment. We talked and we thought he was doing drugs and drinking too much. Others had told me he was cheating on me, and he still denies those stories that others told me. His friend was sure that he was not cheating on me. . . well he finally answered the phone the next morning, when I was supposed to be given a final presentation for my nursing class, I was uncomfortable after talking to him, he sounded depressed and that he may do something to harm himself on the way home. While in the shower getting ready for school, I received a phone call from his friend, telling me his girlfriend had just told him and my husband and her had been having an affair, and that my son had been along for some of their dates. . .and they had sex in our house. That day he went into treatment for depression , suicidal ideation and alcohol addiction, while there he admitted he was also addicted to cocaine, and using marijuana, all which he previously denied doing while we were married. He went through his treatment and I have decided to try and make things work. He was doing well, but I still feel lonely, and the girl is pregnant, he insists that it cannot be his, but I cannot believe that truly until a test is done. She continued to try to call him and me, and I still wonder if she does call him or talk to him. His friend also told me he would hit on other girls and told him he had fooled around with them, again all of this he denies. He tried denying sleeping with her as well, until she told me herself. I cannot get over this, and I have trouble believing that he has not cheated on me other than with her, and I cannot stand by while he has a child with another woman, while I am his wife. I decided to give the love dare a try. I am a Christian woman, and believe in the contract I made with God and my husband. I am doing this without his knowledge, I tried to get him to watch the movie, but he said it seemed stupid, and he got a little upset, and even after I was balling because it hit so close to home, and I wish our relationship could end up the way theirs did in the end, he still was nasty to me and ended up turning his back towards me for the rest of the night. I am starting to feel that I do not deserve to be treated this way, that I do not need to be questioned and monitored, that I can't speak to my guy friends who I have know for 5-10 or more years without getting harrassed about it. He will be nice one minute and then give me a hard time about something, nothing at times. I feel like giving up on our marriage, but I do not have the energy time or money to go through with a divorce or separation either, and i don't want to put my son through it either. . . I hope this dare works. . .please keep us in your prayers
Erika
5/7/2009
My husband and I will be married for 5 years on May 22nd. We have gone through a lot over the past few years. We have part of his family living with us, since his step mother and father are going through a terrible divorce. I am on day 13, and although I feel that in the past days god has changed my heart toward my husband, I feel that I am slipping backwords. His father has been living with us for almost 3 months now and does not help out finacially with anything. Is has become such a huge burden to bear, because I am the woman of the house and he sometimes tries to treat me like his wife. I have tried to tell my husband over and over again that his dad needs to leave and move on with his life, my husband cannot bear the thought of kicking his dad out. I know that my selfishness is starting to rear it's ugly head again, and I am fighting it every step of the way. I keep begging god to help me through this. I know he is there and has done some very wonderful things in our lives lately with our marriage. I feel that the light cannot live amoung the darkness, and to be right smack dab in the middle of watch this terrible tragedy of divorce is killing his and I's relationship. I will continue on with the dare, because I know that the love god has for us will prevail, I am just trying to get through this with out reverting back to the old me.
I love my husband, so very much. I know that this has to work and I need to put everything I have inside me into it!
Thank you lord for this. I will also be praying for others on here.
Nichole
5/7/2009
Hello everyone! I hope this will be an encouragement to those of you struggling. I was in the ministry full time for about 6 years. I was married in church to a good christian woman whom I loved with all my heart. I was selfish and jealous in the relationship and she would tell you that she put her friends in front of our relationship. We dated for a year and a half, married, moved in together after we married, then she moved out to live with her best friend in about 3 months. We struggled for about 9 months and finally divorced. I know this sounds bad, but I kept loving her. We have been divorced for 2 years and started talking as friends about a year ago. She lives in another state 450 miles away now. I saw Fireproof about a month ago and had to watch it over and over. Everytime it led me to crying and thinking about my life. I realized in the very depth of my soul that I really didn't know how to love properly. This was some truth that literally brought me to my knees. I asked God to forgive me and would you believe she called me that night after church just to say hello? I was shocked because I haven't talked to her in about a month. I practiced what the movie said for the first day about not saying anything negative and I held my peace. We had such a wonderful conversation and she decided to come to my town and visit me. Our time together was not all that great as I was not prepared for our encounter yet. I was surprised when she returned home that we continued to talk on the phone. I ordered the Love Dare book and after just a few days, she wants to see me again. I already had a trip planned to my cousin's house in her state so she wanted to join us. She did and we had a blast. It rained the entire time and we were forced to spend time indoors. What a blessing! I was able to fix her car and meet a couple of needs that she had in her life. We realized that we still love each other very much and she will be coming back to me very soon. Some of the things are hard to do with the distance between us, but it's important to me, so I am creative. I'm only on day 15 and I already have plans to see her next weekend for days 23, 24, and 25. It took a divorce and two years down the road for us to figure out that we are supposed to be together. If you would have asked me a year ago if I wanted to be with her, I would have told you that I am going to leave the past behind me. Now, God showed me what pure love is and I will spend the rest of my life showing her that I love her. I just prayed for all of you that are having difficult times. Keep in mind, if you are struggling, trust in God. It will happen in His timing. God Bless You All!!!
Chris
5/7/2009
my husband and i will be married for 5 years this year. We have been through some really, really tough things. We both have trust issues and we get into some really really bad fights even in front of the children. I have started the dare and on day 3. please pray that Jesus will bless our marriage and our home life through this book
5/7/2009
Two weeks ago I arranged to have a weekend away with my wife of thirteen of a half years. I was looking forward to the weekend and getting away from the hustle and bustle of daily life and just enjoying being with my wife. We have two kids (12, and 11) so things are a liitle hetic at home. We arrived at the hotel on Friday, had a great lunch and then my wife asked to talk to me. She procedded to tell me that she was leaving me. I had no idea. She told me she has never been attracted to me, and that she never really wanted to marry me. Oh yes by the way. There is someone else. We had seen the fireproof movie about a month before which got me thinking. I always thought we had a good relationship. Yes everyone has the ups and downs, but I thought, why not start this before it becomes a problem. I started what I felt to change for the better. I think this is why my wife told me now. It's been about two weeks now and I have been doing the love dare everyday. I feel I allready had a headstart on it but am really trying to give it my best shot. We went from talking and saying I love you to now she will not talk to me and says I'm crowding her in less than two weeks. I cannot see me with any other person in my life other than her. I am going to keep up the dare even though I have the feeling she will be moving out in a week or so. I just keep praying to the lord that the right things will happen to me. I feel I am a better person since I started the love dare and hope my spouse can see it in me also. I hope this will allow us to get stronger in our love for each other in the future even though she does not feel the same way I do. I am at a loss of what to do each day so if you could say a prayer for me it would help.
Thank you and God Bless
5/7/2009
My wife and I have been married for 14 years and together for 17 years. I recently found out that she had an affair last year and asked her to move out. After a month I began to regret my decision to move so fast with a divorce. I called her and asked her if she would be interested in trying to work it out. Thankfully, she was. It had been 2 weeks since we made that decision and we've been to counseling only once. She showed up on my door step last night with Fireproof and the Love Dare book. We watched it together after our son went to bed and we cried like babies. The things that took place in the movie were very similiar to what had happened in our marriage. We went over the first day in the book, which is about patience and being slow to anger and it was like God had written that just for me. We are on day 3 now and I'm very encouraged. We are still living apart but I can see God working in our lives. We have been out of church for several years but this weekend, Mother's Day, we are going back. I firmly believe God will cotinue to work in our lives and lead us down the right path. Pray for us!
Mike
5/6/2009
My husband and i have been married 22 years. I believed it was a wonderful marriage. I use to brag to everyone about how lucky i was to have such a wonderful man. Now our marriage wasnt always great. At the beginning we were married young and for the first 5 years it was a struggle. But we made it. We made it through things most marriages wouldve ended on but we stuck through it and finally got to a place that was ful of love and very peaceful. I thanked god everyday for my marriage. I just knew it would last forever. I never gave it a second thought. Well my kids, although still lived at home, were grown, 19 and 21, and we were planning on what we were going to do with our lives without them. My husband helped me get through the little bit of depression i had about them growing up by telling all the wonderful things we had to look forward to with him. I was really starting to get excited about them moving out rather than being depressed about it. I felt our marriage was better than ever. Then 2 months ago, my husband asked me for a divorce. He said he had not loved me for a long time, atleast a year in his opinion. He couldnt give me a reason why just that he was sure he never wanted to spend another day in the same house with me. I was devastated. I still am. My uncle immediately brought over the fireproof movie. While it was moving and inspirational to me, my husband mocked it, saying it was a cheesy movie and wasnt going to help anything. He was unwilling to try anything. As a matter of fact wanted us to seperate and get the divorce papers started immediately. So i moved out. I am now living in a one bedroom apartment by myself. I was really depressed. I could not stop crying. I went buying a four bedroom house with a wonderful husband and two children to renting this tiny shack of an apartment on my own for the first time in my life. I was both scared to death and devistated feeling that i had just lost my whole family. I pray every day for god to lead me. About 3 weeks ago my husband finally opened up and told me he thought he was going through a midlife crisis and wanted to try to work on his marriage. About one week ago he started second guessing his decision and i thing is sorry he ever said he wanted to work on it. I feel him getting more distant. Im scared. I started the love dare 6 days ago, the day after he told me he was having second thoughts about working this out. So far it has been very difficult for me. I really need guidance. I feel like giving up. I pray everyday that i will get some response. I know this marriage is worth saving but i wonder if it will be saved. I want him to love me like i love him. Im not sure he ever will. Im not sure he ever has. Please pray for us. Pray for him. I know he is really hurting right now. This can not end like this. We have been together too long and had a great relationship. My kids are shocked. They along with others have only seen us in a loving and caring relationship. How could this happen??? I really dont understand.
Desperate to save my marriage,
Maggie
5/4/2009
Hi there,
Last night I watched Fireproof "alone" and I cannot stop crying. I have been a born again spirit filled Christian for 7 years. I have been married to a born again spirirt filled Chrisitan for 5 years. I have a son who is 11 today from a previous relationship who is continuosly rejected by my husband - I also have 2 other children, a 3 year old son and a 11 month old daughter. Favoritism is blatant towards them - my husband has built walls around himself and ONLY his "blood family" may receive his love and affection. Things were quite bad at one stage - I had to apply for a protection order. besides the fact that the 2 people in the movie have no kids - their life is EXACTLY like ours - the way he screamed at her is EXACTLY like my husband does with me and my son - we tremble. This situation has caused me to go numb and "feel" far from God. Although I still honor God with my mouth and tell every person I come into contact with about HIm - my heart has been far - I have not been able to face my problems anymore. The fighting and the rejection and the pain has been too much to bear.
I realised after watching the movie that - this is not about me anymore - it's about not leaving my partner behind. All I was planning on doing was leaving - now all I want to do is see God's glory restore this man who cannot even love himself. Please pray for me that I will beable to love him as Jesus loves him. Please pray that I will have courage to stand and keep still...
Lord save my family I pray in Jesus precious blessed mighty name...
There is NO GLORY FOR YOU FATHER IN A BROKEN FAMILY...
THERE IS NO GLORY FOR YOU FATHER IN DIVORCE...
I pray Father that you will shut my mouth - so that there may be peace.............
5/3/2009
my wife and i have been married for 16 years now. we have been close but recently we have gotten distant. we have had numerous medical problems and the financial woes have been great because of this. we have had our fights and disagreements but we still love each other. we have had to find ways to fall back in love again like we were when we were dating. it is very difficult, i work a different shift than she does and we have no time for each other together anymore and their are no jobs to switch to a better shift. it not only hurts my home life and my relationship with my wife and son but also with god.i am not able to go to church so i can grow spiritually and it has taken a toile. i have started the love dares without her knowing and i can see an improvement in our relationship. i only hope with god's help we will overcome and be stronger in the long run. i wish there was a way to work and pay bills but be able to spend more time together. i ask for your prayers
5/3/2009
I am amazed at the stories I just read. My wife and I were married about 5 Yrs ago. Just yesterday at our 1 yr olds birthday party she tells me she wants out of our marriage. I knew that something was bothering her but she was shut down and it was hard for me to talk to her. I work out of town every week and she has told me she feels like a single mom. This I know is my fault. I put material things before everything, even my heavenly father. I know that God is in control no matter how messed up things seem. So, I have ordered the Love Dare and will give it my all. My wife and my son deserve a strong, Christian father, and this I have not been. Please pray for my wife and I that God will do a work in both of our lives and that we will be able to save our marriage. My prayers to all others as well.
dwight
5/2/2009
My husband & I also just watched the movie. I even bought the book because everyone was talking about it. We have been married next month will be 8 years. We too have gone through alot. I have always said that God sent me my husband because he knew what I truly needed to keep me with Christ. I had just gone through a very messy divorce with an ungodly person. I met my husband on a blind date that my brother & sister in law had set me up on. I tried for so long to avoid the date but again God had other plans. December 31, 2008 was 11 years we have been together. I had never had a man want to sit in church with me & when my ex & I got divorced, I pray for several things. #1 someone who was wanting to live for Christ, #2 someone to be good for my daughter & myself, #3 someone who could accept my family situation with my parents also living with us. I know God sent Jerry to me because he knew that Jerry was for us. Jerry is a wonderful man. For the most part, we do not fight but do have disagreements . . . as all couples do. We have gone through a lot losing my parents in the last year, several surgeries and even one surgery where my family almost lost me. God is GREAT. Thank you for such a wonderful film. I can't wait to see more films like this one.
Narlene
4/30/2009
My Husband and I just watched the Fireproof movie. Since we work almost exactly opposite shifts it is really hard to find the time to curl up on the couch and watch movies, this was a great choice, and we were both teary eyed by the end. Both of us are such saps. We have been married for nearly 5 years and I suppose we have our dissagrements but we tend to talk them through we dont generaly argue and we are very close. It hasent been all bunnies and roses though, we have had financiel problems, medical problems, and we have both given up things we have wanted and needed for the other. We have been searching for quite awhile for something that will continue to strengthen our relationship more but in a biblical context. Something to help keep us close when it gets really really hard. We just ordered two copies of the Love Dare books and we hope this is what we have been looking for and something we can apply to the many many years we have ahead of us.
Written together,
Andrew and Amanda
Amanda
4/28/2009
I watched the Fireproof movie at a marriage seminar that my fiance was not able to attend. This movie and entire concept came right in time because we have been battling with some tremendous trust issues for quite some time.
A few years ago, we were having a difficult time and my fiance was not very easy to talk to. When I would present him with my concerns, he would respond in a very insensitive manner or just get extremely irritable. At that time, I went to a female co-worker and close friend, just to be heard. When my fiance found out that I had spoken with her about our concerns, he became very angry and said some really hurtful things about my friend and I.
More recently, we were having difficult times and he was being very disagreeable, insensitive and argumentative. Again, I communicated through e-mail with an old male friend of mine whom I had known since middle school for advice. Initially, when my fiance confronted me about it, I chose not to share it with him, for fear that he would over-react and lash out like he did previously. Once I did share with him why I had been in communication with my friend, he did just what I feared he would.
He whole-heartedly believes that this friend and I were intimate, which we weren't. I have shared with my fiance that we only communicated via e-mail and over the phone once. Although my fiance says that he forgives me, at least once every two weeks or more often, this situation comes up and he says some extremely hurtful things.
It has been very frustrating, painful and draining for me the past few months. I have sought Jehovah in prayer as to how to deal with this. I have even asked my fiance how I should handle being falsely accused? I feel as though I keep getting the short end of the stick! I've sinned against my fiance because I went outside of the relationship with our concerns and I have apologized and asked for his forgiveness...but, why can't the initial issue be addressed? Why doesn't he acknowledge the fact that he has not made me feel that I can come to him with my concerns without being judged or spoken to in an insensitive manner?
I started the dare yesterday...please pray that we make it through!
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